| (no subject) |
[May. 22nd, 2009|03:56 am] |
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all i want for my birthday is a james jean print. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 24th, 2009|02:17 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Thursday - War All The Time | ] |
steer clear of me.
i'll destroy any sort of happiness you harbor.
i'll eat your dreams and show you reality. |
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| I can feel it. |
[Apr. 7th, 2009|05:47 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | The Movielife - Jamestown | ] |
You know, I am really not as smart as I lead on I suppose.
In fact im a complete fucking idiot, im just really good and backing my points up.
When I meet women, the ones im quite interested in, I realize they are really smart people.
They are together for the most part and have their shit going on.
What the fuck am i thinking that someone older, wiser, and much more driven would be interested in me.
Thats just fucking bullshit.
I can run around pretending im fucking awesome and have everything on my side, when in actuality im just like every other fucking dipshit hipster kid.
But you see I know this already. I think being aware makes me better. well it doesnt. not one bit. Its time to give the fuck up.
Accept my sentence and get along with the days.
But you know. I will not go down without a fight. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 6th, 2009|07:53 pm] |
I'm at that stage where I am no longer comfortable expressing myself to anyone.
My feelings and ideas stay locked inside my mind.
My worries and regrets no longer meander through the pages of anything.
I want to thank you for being not only my best friend but my mentor,
the person who raised me alongside my mother.
The things you've done for me, I dont see anyone do for their grandchildren.
Thank you.
You are a man among men, and an amazing human being.
The cats are hungry, get better soon and feed them!
I can't even pick the phone to call my closest friends to talk
it feels foreign.
Thats bad. |
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| Home. |
[Apr. 1st, 2009|03:07 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Left For Dead - Pulling Teeth | ] |
The way some people deal with situations is absurd. but thats life
I love my friends. I love the people around me
I love my grandfather.
I'm super stressed about him and everything seemingly coming down at once onto me.
Nothing working out.
Im happy toms happy, i really am, I just wish it happened differently
whatever, I lay blame on the lesser sex.
Pulling teeth's 5th witches sabbath came out
they covered Left for dead, two tracks Who D'You Know? and Skin Graft.
They did a fucking stellar job.
Check out what came in the mail today for little ole me.
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 31st, 2009|12:09 am] |
Lets Hear it for A. Everything Sucking at once
B. Being Poor
C. Apparently not being as good as my friends to hang out with. big surprise that toms cooler than me, what else is new.
D. This impending feeling like im fucking my life and becoming a huge fucking let down. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 28th, 2009|06:09 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Bars - Too Far Down | ] |
my grand pa is in intensive care for pneumonia.
i'm broke.
this city is a fucking tapeworm.
give me my life back. give me my happiness and childhood dreams back.
41
crush crustacean bodies along shorelines
create the earth beneath your feet
and rip the existence from a creature
just to feel the strength of a god
we play this game with our faces to the sky
beautiful wrenching sound amongst
our palms are we hold index finger to index finger
I cant feel my own regrets
I can feel the skin slip off your bones
i've collected so many teeth
i've harbored my regrets in every person I cross
the environment is breathing with my hatred
every chance, a certainty
your faith is my crutch
as I cross oceans of beliefs and dreams
just to shattered the ignorance you try to personify
give him life
give him legend
give him fiction
give him reality
but what good do these do for a dead man
give me life
give me legend
give me fiction
give me death. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 21st, 2009|02:01 pm] |
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I wish people would take responsibility for the messes they make and the people the invite over to this house instead of being a bunch of dip shits letting our house get trashed and adding to the mountain of shit against us in the neighborhood. |
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| 40 |
[Mar. 11th, 2009|01:04 am] |
once steadfast and honored thoughts
now become frail with the clocks whim of loss
the innocent is lost between the witching hour
influence and promise hang their coats
on doors made of salvaged human skin
organs decorate the last supper upon dishes of
greed, and vanity
our liver and kidneys disobey the command
finding themselves en route to another mass
fair trades and farewells imprint their short lived memories
Hades takes our skeletal hands and leads us forth
Styx and stones may break our exoskeleton
but forewarned words
never reach their destination
it's the pleasure of our stature
to watch you decay in your own homes
penniless thieves we train you to be
psycho's you turn out to be
this laughter
is that of a million unwed souls wishing their last
was between bedsheets of loves forgotten. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 9th, 2009|01:54 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Doomriders - The Chase | ] |
I'm gonna hang myself from some wedding bells one day.
In dire need of some new camera toys.
Here's what the fresh air brought me.
 |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 6th, 2009|12:39 am] |
| [ | music |
| | The Movielife - Racer | ] |
god damn the internet.
its 12:45 and I wanna be asleep
but I just can not stop listening to the movielife these past few nights
maybe its a sudden turn of events in my life
or how much I fucking miss hanging out with spencer and sam
who knows.
"I hope his conscience eats him alive" |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 4th, 2009|12:35 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Thursday - How Long Is The Night? | ] |
money
sell your soul for money
work the daily grind
forget the hope of achieving happiness amongst your peers
we
are all
as driven
with the lies
we sleep with at night
39
I can wear you thin
wear the soles off your shelter
scrape your knee's against gravel
make you grovel
praise be to lobotomist,
sandblasting your dreams straight from your skull
wear the sheets you lie in
robes from developing nations
to coat such surreal hatred for my own short comings
caught up in the sway of tree's
in neighboring lawns
watering the saplings from nuclear warfare
dwindling obelisks crash far into the depths of the sea
tremors bury the pillars amongst the pirates of yesteryear
rib cages will rattle with the echoing silence of self solitude
emptiness becomes you
emptiness became me
emptiness is the end of the line
a world so shattered and torn
the end of the line
tooth and nail, rank and file,
march the death trail
head high and proud for a nation with its beliefs
lost in the ambitions of generations gone sour |
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| 38 |
[Mar. 2nd, 2009|01:15 am] |
fresh fruit from rotting succubi
weathered tomes and unearthed graves
this day and our daily bread
are focal points for our nations god
the figment so seperated from state
that our trespasses have been forgiven
but the equality I stomach deep in these covers
has enveloped my self loathing
and brought me to my knee's to worship in jest
frail minds brood false ideals
but wagging war along picket lines
with pistols and hand grenades
leaves the praise for those to scared to speak their minds
BE STILL, BE SILENT, REFORM
my peers ability to form singular opinions
from the depths of their make up
is deader than the horse our god rode in on
those that treat the goblet with fear
follow the whims of those who hold the blood |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 19th, 2009|10:06 am] |
I would like to thank the USPS for being so damn careful with my mail.
My down to nothing - save it for the birds lp arrived in better condition than it was shipped it. WEIRD! Now I can run a chain through the LP and wear it like flava flav's clock. thanks oodles! |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 12th, 2009|10:54 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Jawbreaker - First Step | ] |
i've gotten all my shit squared away for umass boston, now im waiting to see if I get accepted.. again.
i'm coughing up things the government tries to hide from childs eyes.
I blame this god damn I <3 U on the top right of my screen. what the fuck live journal?
pre ordered the defeater album, its limited to 200 on tan vinyl, should be cool. its a good record
I expect Sam to review it for the zine or some shit.
i'm really the only person who tries to keep this place clean all the time.
i'm drinking some organic tea deal right now its got the echinacea shit. which according to firefox. is not a word. good job guys.
i'm pretty stoked on going back to school taking some writing classes, poetry classes, lit classes, learning something. you know doing that strapping young college student deal.
I visited sam and spencer recently that was awesome. I love seeing them more than anything. I'd love to move in with them. now those would be some times for the books. maybe after school.
if sam doesnt fall into that tango where he lives with his gf.
"its a cold new england winter and the charles wraps its cold hard grasp around my waist and hurls me into precious times where ive fought for breathe in screaming matches against the walls of your exterior hoping for a break in the sowing so I can flank you." |
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| - |
[Feb. 10th, 2009|10:37 pm] |
I'm sitting in a sea of frozen spit
sick with congestion and fever. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 2nd, 2009|12:10 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Sinking Ships - Give Up | ] |
youre adrift in the sea
your raft bashful
ashamed of the urchin it's carrying
to embankment after embankment
searching for another earthen sprawl
to reach jagged claws into
and resurface the reassurance
that all good things do come to an end
the ocean breathes deep mist filled breathes
down your back and beneath your heels
as you stand top heavy over this great sea
the general convictions
and yearly vows become shit in your wake
terrorizing magnificent lands
and in tow you bring hatred
worth a walk on coals
and a love so shattered
the shards would make their way to our hearts
completely under the radar
and for compassion
you lack the vocabulary for such gracious deeds.
-
I had some fun with my roomies last night, wrestlin' as I took some photo's
here's my appreciation for ( american soil ) |
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| oh hi! |
[Jan. 30th, 2009|09:13 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | The Smiths - Unlovable | ] |
i think screaming its s silver lining to hatred
its vocalization exercises like those that keep me breathing
under the weight of gallons of processed ideals
and prized women flanking their adversaries.
youre useless. the image of ant lions clawing your skin
is forever scorned by the fire you breath beneath the sheets
male skin stretched across your back, beneath your feet
tread with stiletto heel, and Achilles mentality
because youre so frail
a battle won is a revenge impending
heat struck and taken aback by dementia
you'll die before my spawn have reached their fullest
meek hunger and weak engorged
the suit you follow, the traffic you stop
the deserts you water, the glaciers you melt
knee deep in your own intestines
wary of the last supper becoming the death of your smaller size
you've broken bread with god and you're afraid of image
i'm afraid youre mistaken
because this wine
it's your own fucking blood, and the coming stigmata
its your own grave
and this bread
its your own salvation
but what do you care?
i've nailed crosses to your back because I want religion to wash away
with all of the disrespect I hold for your kind
floating through eons, a host for bigger parasites |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 27th, 2009|09:41 pm] |
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promise me the passage of time will be kind. |
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